You may have noticed some changes in Ridgeview News coverage recently and perhaps a little less coverage on some area activities. It doesn’t take much to upset the balance of my already chaotic life but I assure you I am attempting to create a schedule…which is the issue, I’m terrible at that! I have most always flown by the seat of my pants, which is probably both an endearing and maddening character trait for those who have to deal with me on a daily basis.
By way of an explanation and to hopefully encourage someone else who travels this road I’m on, I determined this morning to share with you on a very personal level.
On Christmas Day 2023, I determined that I would start spending the evenings and nights with my Mother. She used to tell us (and still believes it), that she never wanted anyone to “have” to take care of her in her old age. I used to joke with her and tell her that she raised me for 18 years and that I owed her at least that much. But, if she lived 18 years and one day, I was putting her in a nursing home. She is now 88, so that would make her 106 and me 79 years of age.
Out of the four of my Mother’s remaining children, it made the most sense for me to stay with her, being that I lived next door and I could easily run to and fro, taking care of my home in the same terrible manner I’ve always managed, and making sure she was safe. I’d make Ridgeview work, and for the most part it has! But it’s an adjustment. So please bear with me as there is a bend in the road of life like there is for everyone at some point.
My Mother’s dementia has mad me cry and made me laugh, sometimes at the same time. I’m not a medical doctor or anything in the medical field, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express in Ironton, Ohio a few weeks ago, so I feel that makes me qualified to offer advice.
If you’ve known my Mother, you know she is a caretaker. And the desire is still there. Every night at around 8 p.m. together we share two cookies. Only two, because anymore would be too many and the world eats far too much according her. Mother lost the filter on her speech a few years ago and now points out anyone that should have stopped after the first cookie. Which cracks me up because I know that’s how she thinks about me.
My Grandmother Vada, who my mom helped to care for until she passed away in 1994, had Alzheimer’s for several years before passing. While I cannot say that I understand the difference between Alzheimer’s and Dementia, I can tell you the difference between my Mother and Grandmother. Mommaw Vada’s began much earlier in age and her personality changed very quickly. It’s not to say that Mother’s personality won’t change, but at the present she’s still the very tender hearted woman I’ve always known. But what has changed is her comprehension of nouns and ability to communicate what she knows she should know. I spend much of my time with her finishing our conversations, looking for her cane and telling her that she used to eat the same foods that I fix for her, which she now insists she wouldn’t eat for love nor money or that she loves and has never ate that before in her life.
The headline of this story is from the Book of Esther in the Bible, Chapter 4, verse 14 which reads “For if thou altogether holdest thy peace at this time, then shall there enlargement and deliverance arise to the Jews from another place; but thou and thy father’s house shall be destroyed: and who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”
The story of Esther reminds us that we are each called to a purpose in life. I fully believe that God called me to do the Ridgeview News, therefore I cannot ignore that calling. But He also expects us to take care of our people, so I won’t take that lightly either. God and I both know that He created me to be somewhat of a scattered personality. Meaning that I float through life much like the dandelion seeds!
Tonight I’ll be in reporter mode as I cover the Town Council meeting. And I’ll abruptly leave when it’s over, as I need to get back home. I love the community for which we live, because I know that many of you know my Mother and should she be out and about you look out for her. She tells me how wonderful the new people are at Foodland, every time she goes there and sees the same people who have worked there for years. But she remembers how they help her and appreciates them. I do to.
I shared this information with you today in hopes of encouraging anyone else experiencing something similar, or just to encourage us to look out for one another. Also, if you know of a news story, please send it my way. I’d love to hear from you.
